| [ | Current Location |
| | ineedtoflyaway | ] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  shitty | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Foolishgames | ] |
I think its for the best.
Education- Sometimes, I think that isolation is not necessarily a bad thing. That way, I cannot hurt myself with minor things. My father always told me, never open up to let yourself get hurt. I'm starting to realize why he said that. Maybe its the appropriate thing to do. I need to focus on what is more important and beneficial to me. It is said that 99% of your friends from your younger days don't end up becoming your friend in the future. I always think that immediate gratification was important, but what really is important is my education, my future and not the past that I will be regretting in the future when I'm a lowly paid worker. If I continue with this attitude, I will be unsuccessful when I grow up. I am my own boss, not other people's trash. But, remember a leader is someone who not only teaches others but also keeps learning. Friends- I do have some good friends around me, but sometimes I think whether they actually care about me. Some of them constantly show me that they are selfish and are normal teenagers. Don't get me wrong, I love all my friends whether they are good for me or not. I've had my fare share of betrayals and broken friendships. Those moments show me who my true friends are, The ones that are not selfish. It really gives me an insight on so many things. It shows me how to be a much better friend. Hopefully, you all know where I'm coming from. I will be there for all my friends, if your in trouble or need some help. But will you be there for me when I need someone? Friends do not bitch behind people's back especially mine. Parents- I don't know what I'll do without them. I would probably be a pile of broken glass, beyond hope of being put back together. I love them so much, no matter how much I make them angry, they will always strive to make me a better person. I am such a demanding and selfish person. I love them for not shoving me aside and not caring about me. I don't know what I'll do if they leave me. I don't want to hurt them anymore. I don't want to give them any more burden. The question is, how to be a better daughter.
I don't know why, but i've been feeling shitty the past few days. Probably 'N' levels? Urgh I excessive mood swings and anybody that talks me pisses me off. I need to seriously see a doctor about this. Ok maybe not. I don't want to be called the psycho of my school. The people that I can only talk to are my parents. Only they understand.
Ok I have blabbered enough shit about my life and thought. From this day onward, I am going to be more independent and self-reliant. No more help from other people. Study time is going to increase and I am going to make it an effort not to go out anymore until all this is over. Cannot wait for my genting trip. Away from this bustling country, to the mountains and fresh air. No traffic, outdoor air-con. How about that. Ok. Have a good night everybody.
|
![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small}
avenue32's journal
crazy
hopeful
determined
amused
content
blank
bouncy
productive
nauseated
chipper
